As someone who’s really just entering adulthood, when I think about dating, I feel completely unprepared.
Our generation didn’t grow up dating seriously.
We grew up texting. DMing. Situationship-ing. Talking for months without labels. Saying “something like that” when people asked if we were in a relationship.
When my friends and I talk about relationships, it genuinely feels like the blind leading the blind. We’re all trying to figure this out in real time, without examples that feel realistic or rules that actually work.
So now that we’re actually trying to date with intention — as young adults, thinking about partnership — it feels harder than we expected.
It’s almost like a job interview with an unspoken list of rules.
Don’t come on too strong.
Don’t show you care too soon.
Make sure to show what you bring to the table.
Don’t do this. Don’t do that.
And somehow, it still goes absolutely nowhere.
That sense of unpreparedness isn’t just personal. According to recent Harris Poll data from Match Group and The Kinsey Institute, while 80% of Gen Z believe they’ll find true love, only 55% feel ready to commit to a relationship.
With social media being such a prevalent part of our lives, we see relationships constantly — what they look like, what they cost, what they require. Love becomes something we consume instead of something we experience. So we come into dating already comparing, already cautious, already halfway out the door.
The 2026 Dating Truth Report, published by popular dating app Hily, describes this as a “dating-reality disconnect,” where social media distorts expectations of what dating should look like versus how it actually feels.
Dating apps intensify that disconnect. When the possibilities feel endless, it becomes easier to disengage, to ghost, and to move on — because there’s always another option waiting.
This isn’t everyone’s reality. I know that. I’ve seen healthy relationships. I’ve seen people fall in love, get married, and choose each other every day.
Still, I’m confident many people would agree that dating has started to feel like a humiliation ritual.
I don’t go into it hopeful or even cautiously optimistic. I go into it expecting to be thrown for a loop. It’s the same feeling you get right before a drop on a roller coaster — when you know your stomach is about to fall, but you don’t know exactly when or how.
It doesn’t help that we’re part of a generation that often pretends we don’t need love. Like wanting it is a distraction. Like it gets in the way of ambition, self-discovery, or success. But I don’t think that’s true. I think multiple things can exist at once. You can want love and want more for yourself. You can build a life and still want someone to share it with.
So the question becomes: where do we go from here?
I don’t have the answers. I’m still figuring it out.
I do know that I want to approach dating differently — with curiosity, honesty, and a willingness to embrace mistakes as part of the process. Because even in a world where love feels complicated, transactional, and constantly on display, even in the awkwardness and uncertainty… it’s still worth trying.